Happy Birthday, Bee!

So next week is the Bumblebee’s birthday. We told her that if she wanted to, instead of having a big party this year, she could have her first sleepover this weekend, and that’s what she decided to do. We told her she could invite three girls, but she ended up only asking two, and so far one of the moms hasn’t rsvp’d. We had a fairly long conversation about why she could only invite girls to her sleepover, and I think she still doesn’t really get it (“but the Sweet Potato sleeps here! and he’s a boy!), but I’m not that interested in being the first mother in the first grade to hold a co-ed sleepover.

Last night, the mother who did rsvp called to tell us that she wasn’t sure if her daughter would spend the night or not. Her daughter is worried that if she comes to the party and can’t hang, the other kids will laugh at her in school, and now I’m starting to worry that the Bee will have the sleepover where no one sleeps over. I’m starting to wonder if she’s too young to have a sleepover. I definitely remember having sleepovers when I was six, but hey, that was back in the 70s when we didn’t have carseats, and our moms smoked in the delivery room.

UPDATE: So the second mom called today and left me a message saying that her daughter had another birthday party to go to, and could she drop her off at 8:30 p.m. WTF???? So it looks like we will have a birthday party where the two guests aren’t here at the same time. I’m not really sure what we’re going to do, it was back-to-school night tonight, so we didn’t really get to talk to the Bee about it. I feel bad, because this thing that she was really excited by is not working out at all.

When was your first sleepover? Did you sleep at all? And most importantly, what should we serve for breakfast (assuming someone sleeps over)?

On a totally unrelated note, I’d like to welcome whoever it was that visited my blog by searching for “literature of the sweet potato.” I hope you’re not disappointed.


September 21, 2005. growing up.


  1. fidget replied:

    My first sleep over party was when I was 5 or 6… there were like 10 girls and they woke up in the middle of the night and made a HUGE mess out of my mom’s makeup… it was a LONG time before i was allowed to have a sleepover again. On a side note I could not sleep over at anyone’s house b/c my best friend’s dad threaten to beat me with his belt – it took me YEARS to actually ‘sleepover’ at anyone’s house

  2. Library Lady replied:

    I remember trying to sleepover at my grandma’s when I was about 6 and ending up wanting to come home. Fortunately, she lived right down the block!

    SC started having sleepovers at a friend’s house in kindergarten. But she had frequently spent the night (and weekends) with my sister-in-law, so she was used to being away from me.

    JR (6) just had HER first sleepver at her best friend’s house a few weeks ago. She’d never been away from home without either of us before, but the friend is the one we call her “twin sister” so she really felt at home there.

    You might want to do what a friend of JR’s did for her 6th birthday. They had a “pre-sleepover” party. The girls all came in pjs and brought sleeping bags. They had pizza, birthday cake and watched a movie, then everyone went home to bed…..

  3. dawn replied:

    I think my first sleepover was at around 8 or 9.

  4. chip replied:

    why wouldn’t you have boys at the sleepover? CB had a few sleepovers for her birthday and from grades 1 – 4 she had boys at them, it worked out great actually. Only in about 5th/6th grade did the gender segregation hit big time.

    ANyway, very good idea to limit it to 3 guests; we’ve done up to 8 and always regret it. Small is good when it comes to sleepovers…

  5. chip replied:

    ps we’ve found different kids are ready at different ages. One of BK’s friends would always end up calling his mom to come get him, and this went on through 4th grade. Others were psyched for sleepovers in first grade.

  6. Jessica replied:

    The “pre-sleepover” that Library Lady talks about is a great idea. The mom of one of Meredith’s friends calls it a “sleep under” party. You get the fun parts of a sleep over without the scary parts! You can also have boys and girls without worrying whether it’s politically correct or not.

  7. Suzanne replied:

    My first sleepover was in third grade. It was a big party for all the girls in the class. My best friend at the time was the only one invited who was not allowed to sleep over; she attended the first part of the party but had to go home around 10:00. This did not help improve her status as social outcast. (I wasn’t much better, but at least I stayed through the night…). Good luck with Bumblebee’s party!

  8. Jessica replied:

    Awwww, I hope the Bee had a happy birthday, indeed!

  9. MetroDad replied:

    Happy Birthday, Bee!

    As for the sleepover? Sounds like you’re dealing with some high-maintenance parents. I wouldn’t worry about it too much. Just do whatever you can to make sure the Bee has a good time. That’s first, second, and last.

    I think my first sleepover was when I was around 8 years old. Back then, there certainly were no co-ed sleepovers to be had. Do they do that now? Man, did I miss out.

    As for breakfast? Something celebratory. Maybe go out for a Denny’s grand slam. It should definitely be something special that you wouldn’t normally have for breakfast.

    Good luck!

  10. Jessica replied:

    The only real sleepovers Meredith has had (she’s five) are with her “boyfriend” Noah – and we’ve had a few since my temporary stint as a single mom. His parents are like family to us so to me, it’s like she’s sleeping over with a cousin. I wouldn’t object to her inviting boys to a slumber party – probably because I know that Noah would be the only boy she’d invite! My kids have had successful sleepovers at relatively young ages but they’re both pretty independent.

  11. christie replied:

    Happy birthday to Bee first off.

    My first sleepover – well I had a ton of sleep overs at cousins’ houses and such. But that doesn’t count because it was with family. my aunts and uncles were in the house. My first non-family sleepover was in 3rd grade. It was everyone in the class. The boys slept in one room the girls in the other. At our teacher’s house no less (nothing fishing about our teacher- we all got As and Bs on a big test- she took us skating and for a slumber party).

    To be honest I found it rather boring. Like you come, eat some pizza and go to sleep? Bah.


  12. Comfort Addict replied:

    My memory isn’t as good as it used to be but I think that I was 8 years old. I went to the house of a friend two houses away but we felt like we were in another country. I think that we slept in tree houses or a loft in a garage (how cool could you get for a kid?).

    I think that I slept but I have no idea what I had for breakfast.

    OK, now I know I’m losing it. You probably meant this post for parents hosting a sleepover, not kids who had slept over. I can feel the brain cells dying.

  13. landismom replied:

    Thanks everyone for your comments & reassurance. Well, we talked it over with the Bee this morning, and she didn’t think it was that weird to have a party with just her and one other person (at two different times), so we’re going to go forward. I’m crossing my fingers and hoping that it goes well.

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